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1.10.02

a friend of mine is studying for his series 7 exam [to qualify to be a stock broker]. this involves memorizing so many rules & regulations that studying for the AP us history exam seems like chocolate cake. at the same time, you need to memorize many different vocabulary words as well as a shitload of weird metaphorical crap that makes no sense at all unless you create little stories about it. we were talking on sunday & he brought up one concept in particular that is my new favorite metaphor for my life: the zero minus tick. the zero minus tick is when a stock is going down, and then instead of moving, it stays at the same number for more than one ticker cycle. it is the only time when a broker is _not_ allowed to short sell the stock, even though you would assume that the stock will continue to go down...


my personal stock is stuck at a zero minus tick. neither going up nor down, just sideways... a holding pattern based upon my continually dwindling bank account, my frustrations at trying to find a "real job," my emotional confusion resulting from the possibility that joshua may move to new york, that i want to be supportive to my sister who is going through her own difficulties but am having a hard time pulling my head out of my own ass, &c &c &c....

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